Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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