Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize