mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
i believe in u and ur pee
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