I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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