We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Randomize
