it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
that's an acceptable place to lick
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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