Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
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