I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
