Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I AM VODKA MAN
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
