heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
