Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
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