i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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