Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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