Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
