You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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