When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
