I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
