Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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