you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize