one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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