I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
