Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
