How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
