i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Randomize
