therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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