After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
false alarm. still invincible.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
