ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
