Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
