dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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