We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Randomize
