Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
