Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
