i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
i believe in u and ur pee
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
