just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
