I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
