So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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