So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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