I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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