Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
