That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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