so that wasnt chicken after all
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize