If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
