I'm gonna have a badass scar
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize