i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
