Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize