I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
