what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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