no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
