last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
