I could make wine with my vomit
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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